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[shadowsong26]

Title: Untitled (Yes, it's a copout. Any ideas would be appreciated)
Rating: PG
Genre: Friendship
Summary: After Zuko absently lets slip a personal detail, Suki decides to Do Something About It.
Warning: Takes place after Boiling Rock.

I

 

Toph came out of nowhere, just popped up next to me. "Hey, Suki."

 

"I wish you wouldn't do that," I said, impatient, wringing the last of the water out of my hair.

 

"Not like it matters if I walk in on you taking a bath," she said. "Anyway, I wanted to talk to you."

"What about?" I picked up my clothes and started pulling them back on.

 

"Sparky."

 

I rolled my eyes. "What about him?"

 

"He woke up screaming again last night."

 

I frowned a little. "That's..."

 

"Four nights in a row," the tiny earthbender supplied. "I tried talking to him yesterday, but he just brushed me off. And you and Sweetness are the best at all this...feelings...stuff. And putting her and Sparky in the same place alone for a long time, 'specially when his obvious issues are supposed to be what they're talking about, just seems to me like it would be a bad idea."

 

"I'll talk to him," I promised, a little reluctantly. Toph was right, though. It was pretty much either me or Katara--the boys would either bungle it completely or somehow turn it into a Contest of Strength and Stoicism the way they always do (must be a testosterone thing)--and if Katara tried to talk to him, there would likely be explosions.

 

And death.

 

Well, maybe not death.

 

But maiming.

 

Definitely maiming.

 

II

 

It took me a little under an hour to track Zuko down. I finally found him splitting logs. It was sort of funny--coming up on his right side, it was harder to be wary of him. Easier to remember that he wasn't all that much older than me.

 

"Hey," I said, careful to announce myself rather than just coming up on him. Toph had told me what had happened when she'd unintentionally freaked him out by appearing with no warning.

 

He grunted a response.

 

...All right, that was a little weird. Withdrawn as the prince was, he was usually a little more talkative than that. "Are you okay?"

 

"Fine."

 

I eyed the stack of neatly chopped logs next to him. It came up higher than his waist. Uh-huh. Sure. You're fine. I believe you. Really. This is my totally-believing-you face. "Toph says you woke up screaming again last night."

 

"I'll find someplace farther away to sleep tonight. Stop bothering her."

 

"...I think you're missing the point of this conversation."

 

He sighed, set the axe down, and finally turned to look at me. "And what would that point be?"

 

"That's the fourth night in a row you've woken up screaming," I pointed out.

 

"I'm aware. I can count, you know."

 

"That's not the issue, either," I sighed, and rubbed at the back of my neck, the sheer awkwardness making me tense. "Look, is there anything you want to talk about, or--"

 

"I told you. I'm fine. Nothing to talk about." He turned back to his logs and swung the axe a little viciously.

 

"Zuko, you've woken up screaming four nights in a row. That's not nothing."

 

"I can handle it. I have a system."

 

"...You have a system."

 

"Yes."

 

"For dealing with nightmares."

 

"Yes."

 

"Nightmares so bad you wake up screaming."

 

"Yes."

 

"Okay, that, right there? That's a problem." I perched on his stack of logs, hoping that would get him to stop chopping and start talking.

 

"Why is it a problem?" My brilliant plan had failed. I watched the axe move up and down.

 

"Zuko, you're sixteen. You shouldn't have a system for dealing with nightmares."

 

"Seventeen." He swung the axe again. Chop, chop, chop.

 

"...Huh?"

 

"I'm seventeen." Chop. "Today's my birthday."

 

"Oh. Um. Happy birthday?"

 

He made a face and split another log. "Could you please move?" he asked, quietly, picking up the pieces to add them to the stack.

 

Clearly, this was going nowhere. Continuing to press the issue would make him angry, depressed, or both. I slid off the stack and walked away.

 

III

 

The whole conversation left a kind of bitter taste in my mouth.

 

"You're in a great mood." And, of course, Sokka noticed.

 

"Sorry." I rested my head on his shoulder. "Just...no, nothing."

 

"What's wrong?"

 

There were a lot of things I could've said at that point. Some of them would've caused a fight. Some of them involved sharing things I had no idea were true, and if they were true, were probably the things that the people involved would least want spread around. "Just..." And then a thought hit me.

 

It was Zuko's birthday.

 

He was depressed--which, when thought about, made total sense. Especially if that rumor I heard in prison, about why he'd left home the first time, was true.

 

Something should be done about this. After all, him being depressed brought everyone else's mood down.

 

"I've got an idea."

 

"Um...what?"

 

"Come on." I took my boyfriend's hand and dragged him off. Even if he couldn't cook--Katara had told me a story about how he almost managed to burn their house down trying to make noodles--he could help me find everything I needed.

 

I was going to make a cake.

 

IV

 

"What're you guys doing?" Aang asked, dropping down from a tree, surprising us on our way back from collecting everything we'd need.

 

"Yeah, I'd kinda like to know that, too. Suki, what are we doing?" Sokka asked.

 

"We are making a cake," I told them.

 

"I like cake," the Avatar said, grinning. "Any special reason you're making one?"

 

"Yeah. Apparently, it's Sparky's birthday." Using Toph's nickname made it feel slightly less weird to be baking a birthday cake for the guy who burned down my village.

 

"What, really?" Sokka asked.

 

"Why didn't he say anything?" Aang added.

 

"He did, to me, this morning. Kind of slipped out. I think he didn't say anything earlier 'cause he's not exactly happy about it."

 

"Why not?" Now Aang just seemed bewildered.

 

"Maybe it kind of just hit him that this is his fourth birthday away from home," Sokka said, slowly, figuring it out.

 

The three of us were silent, awkward for a minute.

 

"So...can I help?" Aang asked, a little too quickly.

 

"Sure!"

 

"Yes! Help us!" Sokka added, hot on my heels.

 

I pushed some of the supplies we'd gathered into the Avatar's hands. "You can start by helping us carry everything back."

 

V

 

"I thought you knew what you were doing!" Sokka yelled.

 

"Just because I can cook doesn't mean I've ever baked anything before! I didn't realize it would be this difficult!" I shot back, defensively.

 

"Um, Suki?" Aang said, in a very small voice.

 

"What?!"

 

"Your shirt's on fire."

 

"AAAAAH!"

 

"What is going on in here?"

 

The three of us, guiltily, turned around to face Katara. It was really amazing how well she could reproduce the look on my mother's face after I broke her favorite vase when I was six.

 

"Um...hi, Katara," Aang said, shifting awkwardly from foot to foot. "We were just...um..."

 

"We were trying to bake a cake," Sokka admitted. "Only we just realized..."

 

"None of us knows how," I finished.

 

"Is there any particular reason why you let my brother anywhere near anything cooking?"

 

"He was mostly supposed to hand me things," I said, sheepishly.

 

She nodded. "Any special reason for the cake?"

 

Here came the awkward part. Hoping she didn't flip out, I replied, "Well, I found out this morning that it's Zuko's birthday. So...we decided to make a cake. Er. Try to make a cake. I didn't realize baking was so different from regular cooking."

 

A moment of silence. "Sokka? Go away. Aang, you're holding that upside down." She came into the cooking area.

 

I breathed an inaudible sigh of relief, and set about finishing the cake.

 

VI

 

The cake being baked, all that remained now was to actually eat it. Which, firstly, meant hunting Zuko down. I volunteered to do so, figuring that Katara would turn it into an argument and Aang would give the surprise away.

 

I found him moving his things farther from the group--apparently, he'd really meant it when he'd said he would.

 

"Hey."

 

"What do you want?" he asked, setting down a bag to turn and look at me.

 

“Come on, I’ve got a surprise for you,” I said, trying to be clever and evasive.

“I don’t like surprises.”

 

“This is a nice one. I promise.” Before he could argue further, I grabbed his hand and started dragging him back to the others.

“I don’t—”

“You’ve been moping all day. Actually, you’ve been moping all week, and we’re all sick of it, and you’re going to come back with me and be social for once.”

“I do not mope.”

“You do so.”

 

“Do not!”

“And now you’re being childish.”

He glared at me.

I ignored him.

 

“I would like to be left alone,” he finally said, icily.

 

“Sorry, not an option.”

 

Thus bickering, I managed to drag the sulking prince back to the others.

 

And the cake.

 

I’d like to say that the look on his face upon seeing his surprise made the whole thing worth it, and inspired Love and Friendship and Forgiveness and whatnot. But I can’t. Because it didn’t.

 

He got this strangled look of shock, almost bordering on horror—apparently, he really hadn’t wanted anyone to know what this day should have meant to him. That made me angry—that whatever mess was weighing on him and made him scream in the night also made it impossible for him to react with anything other than shock at a simple joy like a birthday cake.

 

“…Zu? Are you okay?” Aang asked, a little worriedly.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. Um. Thank you.” Dazed a little, he sat down crosslegged at his usual spot on the edge of the circle. Katara cut the cake and passed around the pieces, and the awkward moment passed.

 

It’s stupid to say that cake solves everything, or heals all wounds, or even does a lot to make them hurt less. All cake really does is give you a sugar rush and crumbs all over your clothes—well, not all. The little moment of sweetness, even if it doesn’t solve anything or go very far to soothe, by being a single bright spot in a day, a week, a lifetime, is still worth the effort and the flour in your hair.

 

And I can’t say for certain, since he moved and he only woke me up the first night anyway, but I don’t think he woke up screaming that night.

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