Prompt meme!

[shadowsong26]

Borrowed from bookblather and also tumblr (I posted it there, too, but since DW seems to be waking up a bit more now/today???)

Anyway!

SEND A WORD AND I WILL WRITE A DRABBLE OR HEADCANON BASED ON IT.

Sunlight
Alone
Darkness
Streets
Cupboard
Snacks
Doubt
Joy
Peace
Moment
Rain
Hum
Kitchen
Bedroom
Family
Friend
Garden
Relax
Stress
Job
Fury
Betrayed
Absence
Vices
Pets
Absolve
Stars
Scorn
Praise
Laundry
Papers
Smoke
Wine
Couch
Kiss
Doors
Tree
Dirt
Flowers
Collect
Remove
?+ add your own.

Include specifics (fandom, character, etc.,) if you like but only one or two per word, please. In terms of fandom, I'm mostly writing Star Wars these days but somewhat trying to get back into BSG? Or if you're familiar with any of my original stuff, feel free to ask for that!

((no promises on how quickly I will actually respond but I promise I will in a vague Soonish timeframe XD))

Comments

heck yeah

[beloved_monarch]

Absolve - Star Wars~

Absolve; Alexsandr Kallus (Untitled)

[shadowsong26]

It’s a simple decision, really.

He has done what--he has followed the advice he was given, and some things, once uncovered, cannot be reburied. Some facts, once learned, cannot be unknown.

It is a simple thing, from that perspective. He has always believed in honor, and justice. The problem is, the people and institutions he trusted to uphold those same ideas had--

Well.

But just as he can no longer ignore the basic facts of the situation, he cannot stop himself from following things through to their logical conclusion.

He always was very good at following a thread.

And this one leads to his role in all of it.

Another thing he knows he cannot ignore.

He could, perhaps, lie to himself--like he’s lied to so many people, over the course of his career--remind himself that he was unaware, that he thought what he was doing was for the best, was worth the blood on his hands.

He could bury himself in it--the grief and the guilt. Easy enough to do. Some things cannot be forgiven, he knows that. Atonement can only go so far, and he’s never been one to believe in absolution.

At the same time, he can’t do either of those things. Lying to himself would just trap him in the same cage he’s only just unlocked.

And he wouldn’t be the intelligence operative he was if he hadn’t learned to compartmentalize, to lock away his personal feelings for the sake of the mission. Even if he’d never--quite--done it on this sort of scale before.

So, back to the decision then.

He has pulled on all the right threads; he has all the information he needs now--all that remains is deciding what to do with it.

And, the more he thinks about it, the simpler the decision becomes.

He knows the odds. He wouldn’t be where he was if he didn’t. He’s handled double agents before, not to mention spending some time on short-term undercover assignments himself. Of course, he won’t have a handler, or any sort of backup, if he does this.

But he has certain skills he can offer. Access he can offer. Knowing what he knows now, honor and justice and duty require nothing less of him.

He’s reasonably certain he can manage six months. He’s aware that he’ll be lucky if he survives a year. He knows that any longer is--out of the question.

Another fact he cannot ignore.

But, on the other hand, agents aren’t encouraged to socialize, so it isn’t as though he has any friends to betray.

His sister can talk her way out of whatever corner his choices put her in. And, loathe as he is to give her any credit, he doubts even the full might of ISB could harm her sons, when she’s fully focused on protecting them. Collateral from that quarter is, therefore, unlikely.

All he’s really risking is himself.

And while he doesn’t believe in absolution, he does still believe in honor, and justice. He may never fully make peace with himself and the things he’s done, but he may find some measure of atonement. He has, at the very least, found a place to start.

In the end, it really is as simple as that.

He takes a moment to close his eyes, bask in the dim golden glow of the meteorite, in its new home on the shelf in his quarters.

Then he opens them, locks away any--feelings--that might remain, and begins to plot out the best way to contact the Alliance.

Re: Absolve; Alexsandr Kallus (Untitled)

[beloved_monarch]

(its been 84 years)

BUT I AM BACK HERE TO SAY, this is amazing. I read a bit of it when you posted it originally, and then realized I had no idea who this character was so I had to go and binge watch the entire series so I could come back here.

I've gotta say, really worth the wait of my own making. It hit me right in the chest, and fills the gap between the transition between Imperial Agent and Alliance for me, with Kallus.

Thank you 💙💙💙